Reporter's Notebook: About 61

Can someone still have dreams and aspirations at age 61?

The process of aging may have been extended since the day I was born. People living well into their 90s has been an amazing thing to see. Especially those who been in the spotlight and kept on going all the way through to their passing. 

I was told long ago that people should retire when they hit the age of 65. Our economy no longer allows for most of us to retire at that age. Yet, there have been some friends who have retired after decades of service to their line of work – including a few friends of mine. 

We’re living longer and retiring later. A good sign of progress, I suppose. 

If you are one of these people who are living longer and celebrating the fact that you can outlive your ancestors – good for you! You’re beating time and living well. 

You’re also beating a lot of averages. Perhaps the Baby Boomer generation found a way to stay alive longer than their ancestors. You’re still lucid, you’ve done with your money, you continue to prove that you can do many things as you grow older. 

In all, we’re living longer. Perhaps the next few generations will see that. They might rise to occasion and outlive their parents. 

However, not everyone is that lucky. Many of my friends talk about losing their parents at various ages. Some younger than anticipated. Others were following the track toward longevity to live a wonderful life. 

My parents were within the two camps. My dad passed away at age 55 due to diabetes and heart trauma. My mother had two strokes at age 50. Yet, she preserved through the effects of the second stroke – aphasia, loss of motor skills on side of her body. All leading to a major amputation. She passed away at age 62. 

My brother has outlived our parents. He’s living his best life with his wife of 34 years, two kids and a granddaughter. He had a few challenges, but he has risen to the occasion to do extremely well in his 60s.

I wish I could say the same for myself. I had a brief run of success challenged by the powers to be. There was a moment when I thought things were going to be wonderful. That was a year ago. 

What changed? I had to make a change. It was not what I hoped for. But, I’m still here. 

Considering my recent experience, I sometimes ask why do things have to be a fight? Securing healthcare to match a lower level of income. Staying healthy when the cost of everything continues to rise. Keeping my emotional and mental health in check in the face of challenges from exterior and interior forces. 

All the while, I’m working on elevating the work that I set forth to do some 24 years ago. Yet, I also know that that a slight course correction is also ahead. 

What would that be? 

One, centers on something I love to do the most – travel. As I continue to deal with my deteriorating body, I know that I might not be able to enjoy air travel as I once did. Partly because I’ve seen how mobility devices were handled on some airlines. Plus, the overall behavior of fellow travelers has also worsened. Even though I’ve been immune from most of these situations going back before the COVID-19 Pandemic, they exist elsewhere. 

The mixed comfort of airline travel, along with the stress of dealing with security measures, the devolution in customer service, and so forth do not make air travel appealing to me. If presented with the opportunity to do so, it will have to be a limited situation – closer destinations, shorter flights and more assertion of my status as a disabled traveler.

Car travel seems to be the best way to accomplish a lot of things. I’ve been saying this for a very long time. I have the luxury of time. Not to mention, the flexibility afforded to us – George included for trips that involve the V&R Team. 

Rail travel is also an option, but I would test my ability to tolerate the seven-hour run down to Chicago on the two trains now serving Saint Paul’s Union Depot. Sounds like a round-trip overnight run down there is in order on the Borealis. In Business Class, of course.

Another is my workflow. Being mindful of my health, I have found ways to continue to be productive for everyone. This work requires my whole body to be in a position to work comfortably – including behind the wheel of vehicles we work with. Any loss of body function including brain and vision, means the end of a career. 

I’ve always been a stubborn person. Stubborn enough to keep myself alive and active as I possibly can. That is from my mother, who survived 13 years after her second stroke to move forward the best she could. I may have told this story in the past. It still reminds me of the challenge I have to stay relevant and alive. 

Lastly, the idea of “being there.” My presence on the Twin Cities’ car scene has not been as robust as before the pandemic. While the scene has returned to a full calendar throughout the spring-to-fall period, I cannot guarantee I will be there for every one of those events. Maybe a few, but selectively on those whom I have friends that run or participate in those events. Again, I fall on my health situation and mobility towards this view. 

As I turn 61 today, I am reminded that I am not as sprightly as my contemporaries. I should be, but I let my health make a turn. 

I still have dreams. I wish I had the full capacity to fulfill them.

However, we mark the occasion in a hospital. It is my leg foot again. Even worse. This was not I originally intended to spend my birthday, but here I am.

All photos by Randy Stern and George Torline